At too-early o’clock this morning, my husband and I were sitting out on the porch, waking up. (We don’t smoke in the house, even in February when it’s ohmigod a wee bit chilly.) We were talking about the new puppy and how the poor thing hopefully won’t understand English pronouns because every pet I’ve ever had has been female. Animals are “she” and “her”. Which led to…
(Oh wait. Infodump! My husband fell in love with the Bolo-Noodle breed after doing a job for a couple who have one. He even brought home pictures on his cellphone. Then he went back to do another job for them and was still so in love he threatened to dognap the puppy. J—, the owner, told my husband he’d shoot him in the face and to go buy his own Bolo-Noodle. So…here we are.) (Bolo-Noodle is Bolognese and Toy Poodle, btw.)
Anyway…
Mr S: Another thing about males. Even if they’re fixed, they’re boys. They like a little friction now and then. J— says his little guy is always humping their big German shepherd’s leg.
Me: Really? Ew. Maybe we can get it a special doll or something. Not a blow-up doggy doll because it might pop. Maybe a stuffed German shepherd?
Mr S: Then it’ll start humping all of SK’s stuffed animals.
Me: Or his plush Smurfette! SK would be screaming and I’d be yelling to leave the puppy alone because I have to get a picture of the puppy banging Smurfette for my blog. And then SK would want to know what he’s doing.
Mr S: Making Smurfadoodles, son.
At which point SK opened the front door to ask what we were laughing so loudly about. Us: “Nothing.”
The future Smurfadoodle daddy at 2.5 weeks old:
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Bwah. I love my male dogs. Mainly because for some reason they love me best. Though they only hump the other female dogs, and not the human legs in the family–thankfully. We strongly discourage humping around here. It’s a sign of dominance and we’re the freakin alpha dogs around here. We make sure all the dogs know it.
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OMG – he is the cutest thing ever!
As for male dogs, we’ve mostly had females also, but our current prolly qualifies as male anyway. She is uber-alpha, which took a lot of training!
And I agree with Jaci:
We strongly discourage humping around here. It’s a sign of dominance and we’re the freakin alpha dogs around here. We make sure all the dogs know it.
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Can’t…breathe…
*wipes tears*
Can’t…stop…laughing….
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I have to say it does not matter boy or girl…I have a female bichon and well *blushes* she humps feet. It started out when she was a puppy and it was just so dang cute. She’d “do the deed” and then run like a crazy person doing figure 8’s around the house. Now 13 years later
, she doesn’t quite have the umph as much anymore, but every once in a while, she gets a spark of energy 
gotta love her tho