So my husband went four-wheeling today. The Black Friday ride is an annual tradition (though it was Black Saturday this year due to rain) and is what’s called an LFD ride.
Left. For. Dead.
This is a bunch of idiots pounding through the woods on ATVs at speeds you’d probably be surprised ATVs can reach. Seriously. During one Black Friday LFD ride, a machine broke down and had to be towed. They towed that machine through the woods faster than I’ve ever ridden mine on open trail.
Today my husband almost bit it hard. He wheelied up over a hill and when he landed, he heard a funny noise. Before his could consider what, exactly, that might mean, his ball joint snapped and his left front tire went horizontal on him.
For reference: my machine, with its vertical left front tire (because his can’t be taken out of the truck for pics because the sides of the bed are holding the front end together). Imagine what the machine does when that wheel is suddenly on its side:
If it had happened a few minutes before or a few minutes after, there would have been rocks or stumps or rough terrain for that horizontal tire to hit. I’m not sure how fast he was going but, since they’d just gone through some muck, probably only about 40mph. Still, if that tire had caught and flipped the machine, flinging him into the trees or rocks, the best-case scenario probably would have been a helicopter ride out of there.
Thankfully, there was a short section of loose gravel, so the tire didn’t grab as he locked up the brakes and rode it to a stop.
So we came this close to our lives being irrevocably changed and I have one more thing to be grateful for this Thanksgiving weekend.
(I’ve pretty much covered the possible names to call him, from Asshole to Zipperhead, and I still haven’t burned through the irrelevant, post-incident anxiety.)
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My husband has a Polaris Ranger for working around the farm. He moves out in that thing so I can just imagine your “big boys” playing like a bunch of knuckleads.
Have to say … love the asshole to zipperhead comment — I am so adding zipperhead to my favorites!
Happy day after black Friday and hope you saved enough money to fix that wheel. It’s hunting season. Our dealer has like a three week backup in the garage! I can see your hubby pouting now.
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My friend and 84 year old neighbor rides his to check his cows. Last summer he hit a rock going way faster than 40 and went for an in air loop de loop. His machine landed right side up with his hat sitting patiently for him in the seat.
NOT my idea of fun.
Glad he didn’t damage anything more than his 4 wheeler. Men.
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Glad he CBA* on LFD ride. And yes, I know all about the litany of curse words we have to let loose at them when husbands do dumbass things on their machines. You don’t know whether to hug them close or slap the ever loving shit out of them. Probably both.
*came back alive
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Knuckleheads! That’s a great one!
Ironically, the only time I’ve come off my machine and gotten hurt, I wasn’t going fast enough to register a speed on the speedometer. I’s special that way.
And I pull him in the for the hug and pinch him really hard once he’s been squeezed.
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Wow, Shan, have you guys been lucky with the ATV accidents! I know being smart plays into it (hope you enshrined that pink helmet
) but luck does, too, and I’m grateful!
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We’ve been very lucky!
So were several other people on yesterday’s ride. Besides my husband’s ball joint, there were broken handlebars and a bent tie-rod.
But no injuries!
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Wow! So it was a perfect “story” trip!
Lots to talk about, good endings. 
(Except the repairs, of course.)