Shannon Stacey

Letters to the Idols: Inspirational Songs Week

Dear Michael Johns: (“Dream On” by Aerosmith”) Dude, you totally had me drooling with adoration for you, until you tried to reach for it. Only Steven Tyler can do that without making me cringe. Bonus points for choosing a tough song that spoke to you. If I had a chihuahua, it would have liked you.

Dear Syesha Mercado: (“I Believe” by Fantasia) Let’s be honest. I fast-fowarded through you and I’m not sorry.

Dear Jason Castro: (“Somewhere Over the Rainbow” — a Hawaiian ukelele version) :gaah: I like you so much, but you don’t listen. Pretty melodies accompanied by miniature guitar things are wonderful, but you’re on Idol, sweetie. You’ve got to bring it. Blow some shit up for the general voting masses.

Dear Kristy Lee Cook: (“Anyway” by Martina McBride)

*pause DVR* — That’s a seriously ballsy song choice, chica. Seriously. — *unpause DVR*

And you blew it. You picked it up a bit at the end, but overall I think it was weak. (And don’t listen to Paula. She was probably on her third refill of “Coca-Cola” by now.)

Dear David Cook: (“Innocent” by Our Lady of Peace) (what…by who?) I don’t think I’ve ever heard the song, but it was…interesting. Your voice remains much loved by me, but it was a little weird. Then again, I know all the words to every Reba song and every ABBA song, too, so I’m probably not your target demographic.

Dear Carly Smithson: (“The Show Must Go On” by Queen) I have to close my eyes now while you sing because when I watch you I feel like I’ve pissed you off and you’re going to put me in time out, but as to the singing…I thought you rocked it. Singing Freddie’s always tough, but you gave it hell. Honestly, I was hoping that with the inspirational theme, you might have gone with a haunting ballad from your native land, but what do I know?

Dear David Archuleta: (“Angels” by…he didn’t say)


Oh wait. I’m awake. Bored, but awake. I’m trying not to let rumors your father’s a Stage Nazi influence my thinking, but I thought once you punched it up a notch toward the end, it was pretty good.

Dear Brooke White: (“You’ve Got a Friend” written by Carol King) Gag. That performance belonged on top of a stack of waffles and, in real life, I’d have shoved you in a locker by now. You suckered me in with “Love is a Battlefield”, but now you’re like coffee with extra extra sugar, and I like mine cream only.

Dear Idols en masse: The theme was inspirational songs and nobody sang “Wind Beneath my Wings”? What the hell?

Oh, and Dear Chef Ramsay: I’m so glad “Hell’s Kitchen” is back on. I’ve missed your evil-tempered, foul-mouthed alpha-prick self and now I can get back into that whisk fantasy…

7 comments to “Letters to the Idols: Inspirational Songs Week”

  1. Alison
      · April 9th, 2008 at 1:52 pm · Link

    I had to go hear the original version of Innocents to get it:

  2. Charlene
      · April 9th, 2008 at 3:13 pm · Link

    *blinks* Whisk fantasy?

  3. Jaci Burton
      · April 9th, 2008 at 7:29 pm · Link

    Michael and his neck scarf need to part ways. too David Niven for me.

    Syesha. She’s gotta quit trying to sing the big guns.

    Jason C – I just don’t get the appeal. The song sucked. The mini geetar sucked. He sucks. And I swear with HDTV I can see gnats flying around his dreads.

    Kristy – i liked her last night. And she dresses really well and she’s cute. She’s anotehr Kellie Pickler and she’ll get a country record contract. Betcha. Or she’ll be singing at county fairs.

    David C – didn’t get the song, but still love him big time.

    Carly – oy. too much song for her and she needs to quit being angry with everyone. she’s scary.

    David A – parents need to take the cell phones away from the screeching 8 year old girls. He annoys me

    Brooke – um, nice dress.

    Heh. I read that as whiskey fantasy…now that I could relate to.

  4. Amie Stuart
      · April 10th, 2008 at 9:45 am · Link

    >>Let’s be honest. I fast-fowarded through you and I’m not sorry.


    Ok I actually liked her. And I agree w/Jaci on Kristi–she’s got country record contract all over her.

    I’m with you on Hell’s Kitchen too. My son watched it with me and he was like WTH!!?!? but I love his foul mouth! :nod:

  5. vanessa jaye
      · April 10th, 2008 at 7:32 pm · Link

    I watch everything Ramsey!!! Love, love, love him. He’s a little cartoonish/over the top on Hell’s Kitchen, though. Kitchen Nightmares (Brit version) is my fav.

    Kristy escaped the noose again. *sigh* I agree with D-Listed, she should be banned from singing anything with ‘god’ or ‘america’ in it, then maybe her ass will finally be escorted off the stage for good.

    I soo agree on the David Niven neck comment re MJ. heeheh.

    I think Carly needs a shot of Boxtox the stop the furrowing. :-P

    Our Lady Peace is Canadian, and we luv’em up here. Having said that, I barely recognized the song as sung by DC. A BIG miss there. (I guess this was his *original version* as opposed to him doing a cover of a cover of a cover….. Not hating though, DC has blown me away with several performances.)

    David Archeletta. He’s got a set of chops on him, but, yeah, boring. Very Michael Buble but more like ‘Booo bleh’. Too young to being singing half the songs he chooses with any verisimilitude.

    Jason, i keep refering to as granola boy. The 12 yr girls are going to keep him in the run for a long time. I actually like that version of the song, which isn’t Jason’s version but Israel Kamakawiwo’ole’s (link removed, no longer working).

    Also ditto re Syesha picking songs that are just out of reach of her abilities and because she’s straining for the notes, she’s pretty much never nailed the emotional aspect of any of the very moving songs she’s picked.

  6. Shannon
      · April 11th, 2008 at 9:33 am · Link

    Oooh, I forgot to see who got voted out! (We never watch the results show. Talking about draaaaaaaaaagging stuff out to fill an hour.)

  7. Shannon
      · April 11th, 2008 at 10:55 am · Link

    Dayum! I never had Michael pegged for leaving before Kristy Lee. :popcorn:

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