Once upon a time there was a very nice woman with many messy children who bought a vacuum. This vacuum was advertised as having all the features she loved in that appliance, and several of her friends plus some online reviews recommended the Virtuous Vacuum.

Well, Mrs. Smith took money from her household budget and bought the new vacuum. But it kept losing suction, the wand attachment kept falling off, and the brush kept getting stuck. While not one to complain, Mrs. Smith had spent her hard earned money on this product, so she drafted a letter to the vacuum manufacturer addressing the problems she was experiencing with their product. The company’s response:

Dear Mrs. Smith,

How dare you complain about our revolutionary vacuum cleaner? Clearly, you are a bitter, poorly educated, spiteful woman who simply cannot understand the instructions. Until you’ve built a vacuum cleaner yourself, don’t presume to tell us how to build ours.

And please stop by our website for a sneak preview of our new handheld sweeper!

Thank you,
Virtuous Vacuum.

The moral of the story: If you sided with Virtuous Vacuum, go flip burgers, please.