Shannon Stacey

Search phrases return

Loafing on my birthday. Before the search phrases, here are a couple of cool bumper stickers I’ve seen recently:

My Chihuahua is smarter than your honor student

My kid was inmate of the month

Nobody died when Clinton lied.

And on the back of the streetsweeper we followed this morning: Caution: Driver Fast Asweep

And the search phrases that brought people here:

she squeezed his groin — Interesting phrase to search for. And really, we need more details: was this a loving squeeze, or a psychotic, no more sex til the swelling goes down squeeze. Plus, honestly, it’s extremely hard to squeeze the groin muscle, you know.

crazy ass people — Am I on a list somewhere?

wanna boink — An honest personal ad

how to write a menage a trois love scene — Get drunk and prepare for pronoun confusion overload

how to write a non-graphic sex scene — Spare us the velvety manrods and heaving orbs. Just have him kick the bedroom door closed behind them.

(If both of those last two were the same searcher…you might wanna reconsider that scene)

one hour orgasm — I love an orgasm as much as the next girl, but an hour? I’d have to stop for a smoke halfway through.

opposite of rant word — Umm…rave?

phrases batman says — To the Batcave!

scary virgo — Yes, we are. Don’t forget it.

necrozoophilia pics — Necrozoophilia? Is that like…doing dead animals? Freak! Go away!

dr. howard dr. fine dr. howard — I love the Stooges.

moving to new england what to wear — Anything but a Yankees hat, bud.

weeding etiquette — Don’t bend over with your ass streetside if the elastic’s gone in your granny panties.

titties women rwa — We don’t have titties in RWA. We have breasts. But we do not discuss them, write about them, or god forbid, show a glimpse of one.

bag balm sex — Bag balm is NOT sexy.

smoking erotica wearing leather gloves — You’d want to wear good ones, too, if you’re smoking erotica, so you don’t get burnt when the paper burns down.

bengay on penis — Do it! Really. You should.

whole wheat donuts — Oh please.

shannon what a feeling — Me and Toyota, baby.

fun things to do at a ladies luncheon — replace the CD of Celtic flutes with an EC audiobook *

* — No, they don’t have them, but it’d be fun.

9 comments to “Search phrases return”

  1. Jaci Burton
      · September 6th, 2006 at 9:18 am · Link


    always entertaining!

    Happy Birthday Shan!

  2. KatieW
      · September 6th, 2006 at 10:52 am · Link

    LOL, who searches for these things??

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY! [party]

  3. Pam Payne
      · September 6th, 2006 at 10:59 am · Link

    Happy Birthday Shannon!!

  4. Charlene
      · September 6th, 2006 at 12:42 pm · Link

    Actually, Dunkin’ Donuts makes very tasty whole wheat donuts. And you can feel all virtuous and healthy while snarfing them down. :woot:

    Happy birthday to you! :dance:

  5. Ann Wesley Hardin
      · September 6th, 2006 at 2:03 pm · Link

    I wanna go to that luncheon! LMAO. Happy b-day, kid.

  6. Anna Lucia
      · September 6th, 2006 at 6:05 pm · Link

    How healthy is something made with fat, deep fried, and covered with sugar???


    It’s a class act that makes US laugh on YOUR birthday. :woot:

  7. Natalie J. Damschroder
      · September 6th, 2006 at 9:13 pm · Link

    crazy ass people — Am I on a list somewhere?

    Depends. Is that crazy-ass people, or crazy ass-people? :rofl:

    Happy Birthday, Shan!

  8. Larissa
      · September 7th, 2006 at 8:21 am · Link

    Happy belated birthday!!!! :cheer:

  9. Gabriele
      · September 9th, 2006 at 4:53 pm · Link

    Alles Gute zum Geburtstag. :cheer:

    Lookit, I’ve a little cover goodie for you. The weird thing is that novel is totally not an erotic romance. :rofl:

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