Jack: Stop! Stop typing, dammit.
Me: What’s the matter now?
Jack: I am not Anakin Skywalker. I don’t look like him, I don’t sound like him, and I’ve certainly never been called Anni. You need to get over this teenage fan-girl obsession you have for him.
Me: But those petulant, smoldering looks…why can’t you do that?
Jack: Lady, I’ve given Beth so many smoldering looks her hair’s on fire. You just haven’t noticed.
Me: Could you maybe channel a little of that supressed passion and anger?
Jack: And maybe grab my heroine by the throat and choke her half to death?
Me: Well…no, I guess that wouldn’t go over well in a romance.
Jack: Heavy breathing?
Me: If you wouldn’t mind.
Jack: *throws hands up in disgust*
Me: *wanders away to watch Episode II*